Crazy Ass Planet

The science fiction author Theodore Sturgeon is credited with the quote “Ninety percent of everything is crap.” As I recall, what he actually said was “Ninety percent of everything is crud,” yet in today’s world we prefer crap to crud. But here’s the thing …

It’s one of my favourite quotes (one I’ve gone on about before), though maybe not for the reasons others might expect. The quote suggests a very contemporary focus on crap. But I don’t take it as a dismissive remark about the vast majority of music, movies, books and whatever else is being hustled out there in the world.

I take it as a reminder that ten percent of what we do is gold. Or diamonds or rubies or whatever else isn’t shit but something of worth.

In life, I expect failure, I anticipate disaster, I feel reassured by screw-ups. That’s ninety percent of life. To be surprised by it is to be someone who lives with his or her head up their bum. These balls-ups may occur in careers or relationships or heaven knows where, but they occur all the time and, if you see them the right way, they are pure comedy and very entertaining.

Ninety percent of everything is crap. Ninety percent of everything goes south. That’s how it plays out.

But that other ten percent … oh my! Surely that’s worth all the horseshit?

The thing is, there’s no way of knowing what is going to be part of the 90 percent and what’s going to be part of the 10 percent. It’s kind of a crapshoot. But that’s also what makes it entertaining.

And that’s why I’m always puzzled by people who desperately try to plan and direct and control their lives, as if they have the ability to determine what part will be the 90 and what part will be the 10. From what I’ve seen, you ain’t got no control.

Well, that’s not entirely true. You do have some control, but maybe not the control you think. You can’t control anything by how you set up the pieces and determine how they play out. That usually (not always) blows up in your face. You can, however, control how you interact with people, which helps determine how they respond to you and situations, which largely determines how everything plays out since the way things “play out” is usually about people.

I’ve lost track of what my point was … I’m not sure I had a point. Except to say screwing up not only isn’t the worst thing to happen to you, sometimes it’s the best. (By the way - the guy on the right? That’s Theodore Stirgeon.)

And while there is a lot of crap out there, and much of that is as annoying as hell, ten percent is gold and if that’s what you’re focused on, I think more often than not, you’ll find life generally shines.

(Heavens to betsy, I sound like I should be writing greeting cards!)

(Note: Theodore Sturgeon wrote the novel More Than Human. However, I remember him best for a novella that appeared in Harlan Ellison’s speculative fiction collection, Dangerous Visions [1967]. The novella was called, “If All Men Were Brothers, Would You Let One Marry Your Sister?“.)

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